Saturday, January 2, 2016

14,515,200 Seconds

Has anyone ever told you how LONG 24 weeks is? 24 weeks is deceiving. It doesn't sound like that long, right? Just in case you have never done the math, it's 168 days, 4,032 hours, 241,920 minutes or 14,515,200 seconds. Amazing how that suddenly sounds so much longer!

Well, let me tell you - there are 2 times that I am absolutely positive that it is longer and time slows down to a crawl. That 24 weeks seems more like 24 months (that's 63,120,000 seconds, just in case you were wondering). 

Pregnant with Little Farmer T
The first one, as every mom or mom-to-be knows, is pregnancy. The first trimester can seem a little slow, especially if you were "blessed" with morning sickness - or, in my case, "all-day" sickness. But, that 24 week stretch from 16 weeks until 40 weeks?  Let's just say I'm confident that all calendars, doctors and everyone else who "thinks" they know how time works is wrong. Completely. And. Utterly. Wrong. When you are waddling around like a duck at 38 weeks pregnant and nothing fits...when you have no room to even eat more than a few nibbles of waffle fries and lemonade popsicles (No??? Maybe that was just me?)...when you are drained of every once of energy by a parasite (who you are sure is adorable, but you want OUT), time definitely does not move at a normal pace. It......c...r...a...w...l...s. 

And, then, when that delivery day comes, and you finally meet that little parasite (who, by the way, is the CUTEST baby ever), you are completely enamored and everything is completely worth it. The nausea. The vomiting. The constipation. The countless OB visits where your privacy is totally invaded time and time again. (Yes, I went there - I'm a nurse, what did you expect?!?) The varicose veins. The sleepless nights that you tossed and turned trying to get comfortable with a basketball under your skin. The contractions. Oh, the contractions! Somehow, none of that matters anymore. You would do it all over again in a heartbeat. So, you do...
Little Farmer G
And that pregnancy drags on. And on. And on..............and on.................and on..................and on.............and on...................and.......well......you get the picture.....pregnancy seems to last FOREVER! 

They were so teeny! I think it's time for more! 
The second instance where time seems to slow to a crawl, is waiting on that first chicken egg. I know, it doesn't seem like it could possibly be similar, but hear me out! First, you start with these adorable fluff balls under a heat lamp in the garage who need to be checked on several times a day in the first few weeks. You feed them, water them, cuddle them, clean their bedding, excited about when they will grow up and give you fresh eggs! They are so stinking cute!!
Enjoying the great outdoors!
Until they start stinking and you kick them outside!  You spend waaaay more than you planned to build them a mansion of a coop (cha-ching!) and chicken run (cha-ching!), let them free range whenever possible, feed them organic feed (cha-ching!) and veggie scraps straight from the kitchen (yay, finally something that's free!), keep their water fresh, and clean out the coop once a week (which includes purchasing your bedding...cha-ching!)). At first, it's no big deal, because you'll soon be getting those farm fresh eggs, right?!?!?! Well....yes, but how soon is soon? For the breeds of chickens we have, most sources say somewhere around 20-28 weeks. For us, it was right in the middle - 24 weeks (and some of our ladies still haven't hit 24 weeks since we added more pullets later on). So, after cleaning and feeding all these ladies and one gentleman for 23 weeks, we were starting to give them strongly worded hints that they better start laying soon! Early morning chicken runs may (or may not) have consisted of "conversations" something like this. "Heeeeerrre chick chick chick....no eggs yet? Better get on it! You have to earn your keep on this farm! You don't want the same fate as the broilers, do you?" Thankfully, our ladies are smart and kicked in into gear shortly thereafter! ;) So, after waiting (impatiently) for 24 weeks (168 days, 4,032 hours, 241,920 minutes or 14,515,200 seconds, but who's counting), we finally found this beauty one morning.

Our first egg the morning of Nov 14 following a
full moon on Friday the 13th! Coincidence?!  
Now, when we go out to collect eggs, it's rare that we don't find any. And, somehow, all of that other stuff (the waiting, the cleaning, the feeding, the money, the building of the coop) doesn't seem to matter anymore, and we would do it all over again in a heartbeat....and, we will.